Friday 10 January 2014

The Inflatable Kingdom - Premise, Logline and Step Outline

Premise
The universal presence of good and evil as well as the importance of responsibility.

Logline
A rocket scientist crashes on a new world of unexpected material, only to find himself imprisoned by a king's greed and saved by a princess' kindness. Soon forced to take up the mantle of responsibility and destroy his own creation.

Step Outline
  • Simon appears in another galaxy and his ship starts to fail. He begins an emergency descent onto a nearby planet.
  • As he descends he sees an outstanding view of a beautiful and multicoloured landscape. The ship hits the top of a mausoleum and swiftly crashes.
  • Simon emerges from the wreckage to be greeted by a dark and dismal cemetery. Wanders aimlessly around looking for an exit as a thunderstorm sets in.
  • Unable to see properly, he is taken by surprise when he encounters a large statue. A Lightning flash reveals a scary statue.
  • Simon is surrounded by guards and arrested. He is taken to Bouncy Castle.
  • Arriving at Bouncy Castle he is taken before King Publow. The king has him locked in the dungeon.
  • Simon thinks about earth. He is upset.
  • The king's smartest subjects cannot work out what the rocket is. The king returns to Bouncy Castle.
  • Simon is visited by King Publow. He is questioned.
  • King Publow decides to have Simon deflated (killed). His daughter, Princess Ancy, saves Simon from the dungeon.
  • Simon and Princess Ancy escape Bouncy Castle. They return to the cemetery and Simon's rocket.
  • King Publow finds out about his daughter's actions. He is outraged and orders Simon's immediate deflation (death).
  • Princess Ancy tries to convince Simon to destroy the rocket. Simon is uncertain about it.
  • Simon is eventually convinced and bids his dream of home goodbye.
  • Simon and Princess Ancy flee the rocket. The rocket self-destructs.
  • King Publow sees the explosion. He is furious.
  • Simon and Princess Ancy decide to flee King Publow and live together for the rest of their lives.


Any feedback on this is appreciated.

1 comment:

  1. Hi Kyle,

    This is too long for a 60 second short - too much 'back and forth' - and you don't yet have a satisfying story - which is fine, because this bit of the project is all about having ideas. I've been thinking about your story components, and I've had a few thoughts I'll share with you - though this time the tone is very different!

    I was thinking about your cemetery - and used that as my starting point: during World War 2, Rocket Scientists were involved in the design and testing of weapon rockets. What if your rocket-scientist was responsible for inventing a rocket responsible for the deaths of millions of people? Like Oppenheimer, for example, who 'invented' the nuclear bomb:

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/J._Robert_Oppenheimer

    Oppenheimer was haunted by the enormity and consequence of what he'd created, as witnessed by this famous interview:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=26YLehuMydo

    There's something powerful always about the contrasting of innocence with something terrible - and it suddenly occurred to me that there might be a story somewhere in the idea of a character who has invented something ghastly; I can sort of see how there might be a 'reveal' in Act 3, which tells us who this man is and what he's done, and before that, we see children playing, having fun, a children's party with a bouncy castle; we see the man watching, and somehow at the end, we realise that he's been responsible for 1000s of graves and dead children someplace else. It could be very simple in this way, very powerful? Anyway, this is just another spin of the story dice - but maybe look at Oppenheimer and the idea of your 'rocket scientist' carrying a similar burden...

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